Curses! Beaten by an infant.

I may be fairly well trained in the martial arts, but that didn’t stop me from getting beaten up by my 8.5 month old daughter. It began as any normal baby play session with my wife and I lying on the floor entertaining the little one. Then my wife got the idea of putting her on my chest. So there I was on my back with a baby atop me staring down at my face. Then she pounced, leaning forward she placed her open hand at one of the corners of my mouth. Expecting a pat on the face or just for her to put fingers on my lips I didn’t think to defend myself. How foolish I was, for the next second she clenched her little hand into a fist, scrapping her tiny fingernails across the sensitive skin around the lips. She even drew some blood! Letting out a somewhat girlish yelp I removed my daughter from attack position and leaped back into a fighting stance. Putting on my best ‘bad kung fu movie voice’, I said, “So, you have mastered the Eagles Claw technique! Now let’s see how you handle my Iron Monkey style!”

Seeing where this was going, my wife stepped between my opponent and me and said, “Honey I think it’s time for your brain medicine.”

Leaving the room I swore on my ancestors that I would have my vengeance. No baby gets the better of me. If only I could overcome her Shield of Cuteness technique.